'sneb yn becso dam

twitter

2009-11-06T22:45:00.003+02:00

Joined twitter recently to find out what it's all about. After nearly a week as a member I'm still not sure I know what it's about. Anybody out there ever used it?

2008-09-23T23:12:00.002+03:00

Just a quick blog - request for help. Any Black Country bloggers got a decent recipe for groaty pudding? And does anybody have any idea what groats are in Greek??

2008-08-31T23:50:00.002+03:00

Back to my childhood - place I went to every year until I was seventeen - and still my favourite beach in the world

what's in a name?

2007-06-21T22:28:00.000+03:00

For some obscure reason, the mobile telephone company I use has decided to change its name. It used to call itself "Tim", itself a fairly saft name for a company, but probably
better than calling itself Keith or Malcolm.
It has now decided to call itself "Wind", which means that
thousands of
users, when asked which company they use, , will be forced to reply
"I have Wind."

This unfortunate marketing ploy reminded me of a similar doomed choice of name by
an Athenian slimming company a few years ago. The company's main aim is to persuade
people
to lose a considerable number of pounds, both in the
avoirdupois and financial sense of the
word,
by availing themselves of its services. The enterprising company developed a marvellous
machine
which could analyse your body fat electronically and inform you that you were
overweight.
I can derive the same result by lifting my shirt up in front of a mirror and being brutally
honest,
but technology is so much more fun. The company needed a name for its device.
Here in Greece, many new products are given an English name. It makes them sound
more trendy, more scientific, and so the company decided the machine would have an English name. Many larger than life
posters soon appeared around the city featuring a slender woman with a huge smile on her face. And smile she should. Apparently
she'd just spent half an hour on the "Analiser." I was ready to sign up
immediately, but
unfortunately the posters mysteriously disappeared one night and the company
reverted to
calculating body mass indices with a tape measure and set of weighing scales.

My sister in law's job involves helping companies outside the UK to import their
products
into Britain. She recently received a request for help from an Eastern European
company which manufactures a marvellous toy which offers greater mobility to disabled children. She was
delighted to help, until she saw the name of the toy.
The manufacturers had originally decided to use a beautiful German name, Spasswagen, which means "fun car".  In full awareness, however,
of the fact that
the average Englishman has no ability to pronounce correctly any foreign word
which is not
associated with curry, they decided to anglicise the name somewhat. And thus,
the
Spaz Wagon was born. Predictably, it was not to be a commercial success.

Good night each, kalhnyxta kai nos da i chi gyd

2007-04-08T22:45:00.000+03:00

Something wonderful happens in this big old city every Easter. It empties. Everyone goes to their village to celebrate Easter and a peace decends on the Metropolis that will not exist again until the middle of August. The few of us who remain get an idea of what it must have been like here forty years ago. I'm not being antisocial - I also enjoy the bustle when all five million Athenians - native or adopted - are packed in here like sardines. But it's pleasant to enjoy the contrast every now and again. And I get to enjoy the
pleasure of planting my bottom on a comfortable chair on my balcony or tending to the plants without hearing boy racer
zooming by below on his decibel-maximising souped-up moped cum sewing machine every five minutes.
I also get to enjoy pottering about. It's hard to truly define "pottering about", but basically it's the art of doing something for hours
without actually really doing much that you couldn't have done in five minutes if
you'd put your mind to it. But who wants to put his mind to anything much in an empty sunny city where the most important decision is whether to deadhead the
red geraniums or the white ones. I plumped for the red ones. The white ones will happily wait until August.
Kalhnyxta se olous, good night each each, a nos da i chi gyd

2007-02-08T22:54:00.000+02:00

At last. Just read as ow they'm a-gi'ing Black Country lessons tu nusses worram werking in ospitals in the Black Country. Baht tahm too. I've sid me Gran in ospitals. Her cor understond wot the nusses am a-saying to er, an they doh understand er nahther. They gid er a test t'uther day to see if er wuz
compos mentis enuf ter mek a cup a tay on er own. They day gi'er ne'er a tay pot, an there ay ne'er an old
ooman az ull mek a cuppa wi'out a tay pot, so er day av a clue ah to goo
on an failed the test. Er did ask weer the tay pot wuz but they day understond er. Mebe wi a bit a linguistic lerning by the nusses the old uns wot ay never lernd to spake lark a docta ull get diagnosed right, 'sted a bein classifahd as mentally defective cuz they doh spake lahk they cummen from Lunden.
Kalhnyxta se olous sas, good night each a nos da i chi gyd

Happy to help, guys

2006-10-11T22:46:00.000+03:00

Wow, 655 000 dead SINCE we stepped in to help out Iraq. Bet they're glad we turned up just in time. According to a recent report:

More than 600,0000 civilians have died as a result of the war in Iraq, according to a team of American and Iraqi scientists. The estimate - far higher than previous figures - was arrived at by interviewing residents during a random sampling of households. But US President George Bush, who has previously estimated a figure of (a mere) 30,000, has called the latest number "not credible".

US President George Bush would probably view any number with more than three digits, and any word with more than three syllables, as not credible.

Then the report gets worrying.

Violent deaths in Iraq are currently totalling 100 a day. The UN humanitarian chief Jan Egeland says "many of those are killed by gunshots or have been tortured to death".

But then things look up a little.

Of the 655,000 estimated "excess deaths," 601,000 resulted from violence and the rest from disease and other causes, according to the study.

So you can only blame us for 601 000 deaths. The rest were caused by poor hygiene and clumsiness.

Any other countries needing a helping hand to topple an unpleasant dictator just contact
www. T he W ar A gainst T errorism S quad.com

Kalhnychta se olous sas, nos da i chi gyd and good night each

gwastraff o amser

2006-09-14T22:52:00.000+03:00

Mae'n gas gen i'n swydd i. Dwi i'n eistedd yn y swyddfa bob dydd trwy'r dydd wrthi'n gyfieithu sothrach. Mae'r bos yn edrych arna'i bod tro i mi gyrraedd fel rhwybeth sy'n byw mewn afal. Mae ei chwaer hi, Mopey Dick, wedi bod yn gwrthod i siarad a fi am chwe mis- diolch byth - a phopeth am 800 euro y mis. Cachi! Be wna'i? Dwi'n meddwl am fynd nol i Brydain, am chwilio am swydd yn Sainsburys. Diolch byth mi fydd hi'n ddydd Gwener yfory.
Kalhnychta se olous, good night each a nos da i chi gyd
Ol-ysgrif - Sorry am y camgymeriadau yn y Gymraeg. Os dach chi eisiau'n helpu fi hefo chywiriadau - croeso!
Jamie

success at last

2006-09-03T23:40:00.000+03:00

Success at last

Technophobia

2006-09-03T22:38:00.000+03:00

I am one of the world's great technophobes. Installing anything on my computer usually leaves me shirtless, trembling and soaked in perspiration. I wake up every day to several hundred if not thousand pounds worth of technology, little of which I have any idea how to use. I will shortly have ASDL fitted. It comes with a telephone. I shall no doubt be unable to make a call for six months, terrified that dialling my mother will somehow wipe my hard disc, whatever that is.
Today I have been inspired to overcome this crippling phobia. I paid a visit to the ever charming Sissy, who has recently been on a spending spree in IKEA. She asked me to help assemble some of the furniture she had bought. I panicked. Assembling furniture is on a par with partitioning my hard disc and installing Linux for me. The last time I tried to assemble something was when I bought some bookshelves from the ever blessed Lidl supermarket. It collapsed when I put the first book on it - first the top shelf, then the next one down and then the third. Then the two upright sections collapsed in on themselves. I left it, went to the gym and somehow managed to disable myself by dropping a ten-kilo weight on my right shin.
Tom and Natasha came round later to patch me up. In between helping Natasha to stem the flow of blood, reset the bone, disinfect me, etc., Tom somehow also managed to put together a robust set of shelves from the ruins. Within ten minutes I had bookshelves that would be a credit to the Bodleian Library. I could do nothing but look on in pathetic admiration. It was in the expectation of a catastrophe similar to that of my shelf-building effort that I set about helping Sissy.
As we worked the time passed quickly. One hour. Two hours. Three hours. Eventually, flushed with triumph, we attempted to put the drawers in. We tried again. And again. No way. We collapsed on the sofa and lit up a therapeutic fag. Eventually we returned to the task. I perused and contemplated, panicked, breathed deeply and reconsidered the problem. And eventually we realised we'd put half the drawer together upside down. A mere two hours later the piece of furniture was complete.
The inspiration from actually managing to do something - albeit three hours later than a normal person would - has driven me to attempt more breakthroughs. I shall now attempt to upload a photo to accompany this drivel. If I succeed, I shall publish and be damned. If not, this piece will remain a draft testament to my technological ineptitude forever. Wish me luck.
Kalhnychta se olous, nos da i chi gyd and goodnight each
Jamie

PS I see no picture. I tried. Bugger!

age is no barrier

2006-08-14T22:32:00.000+03:00

Like a lot of gay people, I am "out". All my friends know and it is not an issue with them - friends are friends and are totally unconcerned who I sleep with. My colleagues at work also consider it irrelevant, as it is. It's rarely even a matter for discussion. It's only with older family members that the old barriers come out and things are not spoken about, hidden. I use all the old cliches others use to explain why I've never told them - they're too old, I'm too far away, why worry them, it would hurt them, they're from a different generation where such things were swept under the carpet, they're too old to change their ways, etc.

My siblings are of a different generation and have long since known - again, they're utterly unconcerned. It's now only my parents and my grandmother whom I have left clinging to the hope that one day I'll bring home a nice lass and eventually produce someone to carry on the family name. The idea that I prefer men would, I've always assumed, be incomprehensible to them - especially my grandparents, for whom I thought the word "gay" still meant happy or brightly coloured. I remember once watching wrestling on television with my maternal grandmother before she died. The two wrestlers we were watching were called "Gorgeous George" and "Magnificent Maurice". As they camped it up and fixed their hair after each neck lock, my grandmother turned to me and said "Dost know what? Those two blokes am a couple of lesbians!" This, I assumed, was indicative of my grandparents' understanding of homosexuality.

I went back to England this summer. I was met at the airport by my brother's partner. She has recently given birth to my beautiful niece, whom she and my brother had presented to my other grandmother, now ninety-six years old, a few weeks before. As we drove home, my sister-in-law told me about the conversation when they introduced Gran to the kid.

Gran looked at the baby, turned round and thanked them for giving her a great granddaughter at last. "Her's grand. A day think as ah'd ever av ne'er a great granddaughter (She's beautiful. I never thought I'd have a great granddaughter - Gran only speaks the local dialect and struggles to understand so-called standard English - I'll translate the rest). "Your sister was always too worried about keeping her slim figure and your brother sticks it in the wrong place." My brother and his girlfriend both spat out their tea on hearing this last comment but my grandmother continued unperturbed. She was watching "Will and Grace" at the time. She pointed at the screen and said, "Your brother's like them. He's like your Uncle John. Always preferred the boys. I don't mind though. I still love him."
Years of concealment, only to discover that someone born four years before the First World War not only knows, but is totally unconcerned. We often think that those born many years ago are naive, uninformed. Turns out they knew just what we now know. They just didn't necessarily know the "right" words to talk about it.
Kalhnychta se olous, nos da i chi gyd and good night, each.

a million words?

2006-04-13T22:28:00.000+03:00

I recently read an interesting article in the "Independent" newspaper about the English language. According to the article, the language is about to generate its one millionth word. Apparently, at the moment, English has approximately 988,968 words. Stirring though this is to any true Englishman, I can't help but feel sceptical about the whole idea of how many words a language has. And what I really don't like is any underlying implication that this somehow relates to the inherent superiority of a language.

To begin with, coming up with any reliable definition of what a word is is in itself difficult. Is it a phoneme or set of phonemes that can be uttered individually and have meaning? Try saying the word "the" on its own and see how much meaning you convey, yet most people would agree it is a word.

Then there is English's admirable ability to absorb words from any language it comes into contact with. "My doppelganger's schadenfreude was evident at the barbecue I organised on my patio." 13 words, 7 of them probably etymologically English, but all of them now to be found in many good dictionaries of the English language. Can we really claim the other 6 words as our own to back up our argument we're about to hit the million word mark?

Then try looking at the words "give" and "up". 2 words. Put them together in the phrase "I gave up smoking last week" and the two words, when used together, take on a whole new meaning. Perhaps the phrasal verb "give up" should be recognised as a single third word in its own right. You may say this is not possible, because they are written as two words, but that only holds true, of course, in the written language - there is no gap between the two words when they are spoken. English also has the word "tooth", the word "brush" and the third word "toothbrush". It also has the word "scrubbing" and the word "brush", but lacks the third word "scrubbingbrush", but is there any logical reason to count "toothbrush" as a third word, but not "scrubbing brush"? It may seem unimportant, but when you come out with figures as precise as 988,968 words, it does make a difference.

German happily joins two or more words together as one to make a new word and so go one up in the numbers game. Germans have "Geburtstag" - birthday, "Kuchen" - cake, and the third word "Geburtstagskuchen". English misses out by having only two words, "birthday" and "cake", but we can still talk about a sweet thing decked with candles we cut on our birthday and are in no way disadvantaged by having one word less.

I live in Greece, a country whose people are rightly ferociously proud of their beautiful language. They will happily tell you their language has far more words than any other. However, this is partly because Greek, like German, can easily combine two or more words to produce a third, whereas other languages have to keep the two words separate and so immediately lose out in the word count game, but in no way lose out on the ability to express exactly the same idea. I also used to live in France - another place which is rightly proud of its language, and have recently read a scathing comment that French has a mere 100 000 or so words. How this figure was arrived at, I do not know, but even if we assume it is true, all we have to do is read a little French literature to understand that the number of words is no indication of the quality of a language.

Kalhnyxta se olous, nos da i chi gyd and good night each

within the linguistic framework of lexical roadmaps

2006-01-19T22:39:00.000+02:00

One of the painful things about my job is I get to see lots of texts created by the EU and begin to see what liberties they take with language. This is not one of those "Of my God, my England look what those Europeans are doing to English" posts, by the way. A Greek colleague assures me they make just the same dog's breakfast of the Greek language.

I quote a good one I got today.

The Parliamentary initiative to participate to and actively support implementation of the EC Treaty, which found its expression in this Conference, was recognized as an excellent example of regional ownership and cooperation. In order to improve the parliamentary procedure of the ratification of the EC Treaty, parliamentarians will create an informal network for cooperation and use the proposed structure of a Balkan COSAC. They could jointly develop road maps for the parliamentary tasks involved, checklists for the implementation of the acquis communautaire and a communication strategy to explain to the public the Treaty and the challenges it raises.

An initiative found its expression??

Procedure here means what you do when you move forwards, not procedure as in "how you do something". Like saying "My procedure through the park was interrupted by a dog attack."

Words to do with future plans have all been blended into the all-encompassing expression "road maps." To avoid any hint of obligation, informal networks are now de rigeur. Regional ownership apparently means "doing it yourself", eg. regional ownership for the bathroom upgrade road map" means you get to decide yourself what colour you'll paint the bathroom next week.

Anyway, I trust that within the framework of their roadplan for post-operative relaxation initiatives, all bloggers will have established some informal network for a liver function downgrade within a local ownership context - or failing that, I trust you're planning to go out for a beer with your mates in a nearby bar over the weekend.

Kalhnyxta se olous, nos da i chi gyd and good night each,

Jamie

office rudeness

2005-12-01T23:07:00.000+02:00

How do fellow bloggers deal with rudeness? I ask this question because unsolicited rudeness is something I find hard to deal with like a resonsible adult. I usually sulk about it for days until the offender is accidentally nice to me and then just put it down to him/her having a bad day - until it happens again, when I usually do the same.

On Tuesday, I answered the phone to a customer who asked to be put through to Rita - names changed to protect the innocent - i.e. me. I took the name of the customer and attempted to put her through to Rita. The line was busy, so I tried to get the customer back on the line and take her details so that Rita could phone her back later. As I did so, the line was cut.

I went into the main office and approached Rita. "Rita," I said. A Mrs Z. phoned and wanted to speak to you. Your line was busy and I'm afraid the line got cut before I could get her phone number."

She fixed me with the kind of glance you usually reserve for half a worm you've found in your apple after you've just taken a bite out of it. "The line was cut because you tried to put her through to me when I was already speaking on the phone. That's what happens when you try to connect people with phone lines which are already busy, isn't it." She turned away glacially and made another phone call.

Apart from demonstrating a lamentable lack of awareness as to how telephone systems operate, the terse retort from my co-worker was definitely somewhat lacking in common courtesy. I was miffed. What would fellow bloggers recommend? Should I search for an opportunity to respond in kind? Should I put it down to a bad day? Stick rusty pins into any doll I can find which bears a passing resemblance to my ungracious co-worker? Take an assertiveness training course and then sit her down and have a mature chat about the need to respect the rules of day to day courtesy? Let her tyres down? The alternatives are legion. Except she's part owner of the school and best friend of the boss of the company, so any of the more enjoyable responses could have a serious impact on my employment prospects.

Kalhnyxta se olous, good night each a nos da i chi gyd,

Jamie

spam me baby

2005-11-13T23:07:00.000+02:00

I am kinda fascinated by spam mail. Where do these people get my address? What makes them think I am interested in what they have to offer? I'm now getting spam from people who just LOVE my blogspot. Somebody yesterday was so moved by my blog about Kyoto, written as usual under the influence, that they thought I may be interested in their weight loss pill. I have numerous faults - smoking, swearing, being under the influence, etc., but as all these vices leave precious little time for food, weight loss pills are the last thing on my mind at the moment. Recent unsolicited offers have included lotions to restore my hair - like how do they know I'm bald? (which I am, but it doesn't bother me so why are they trying to help?) - numerous offers of viagra - (I'm going through a lack of libido stage at the moment and I can't even remember if I need viagra - though now I've posted this I'll probably get spam offering me libido pills) - and a weird one some time ago asking me if I'd like to watch somebody doing something anatomically inadvisable with a horse. I also get frequent mails from the American government inviting me to apply for a green card - I wonder how many Cubans get similar mails.

I've been online for four years now, and not yet received one spam about anything I actually want, so how economically viable is all this business? So, to help spammers everywhere. Send me an unsolicited offer of a night out with a team of heavy smoking foul-mouthed Welsh speaking ouzo drinking nineteen-year old body builders who enjoy gardening, baking cakes and watching ludicrous American teenage tv series and I promise I'll send you all my bank details by return of post.

Good night, kalh nyxta se olous a nos da iawn i chi gyd

Jamie

But Kyoto's bad for the American economy

2005-07-23T22:25:00.000+03:00

Just got mailed this by a friend. Happily, illustrious world leader Dubya is sitting safely in air-conditioned splendour, valliantly defending the American economy.

PHOENIX, July 22 - A relentless and lethal blanket of heat has settled on much of the western United States, forcing the cancellation of dozens ofairline flights, threatening the loss of electrical power, stokingwildfires and leaving 20 people dead in Phoenix alone in just the past week.Fourteen of the victims here are thought to have been homeless, althoughthe heat also claimed the life of a 97-year-old man who died in hisbedroom, a 37-year-old man who succumbed in his car and two older women whodied in homes without air-conditioning.Daytime highs in Phoenix have remained near 110 degrees for more than a week, and municipal officials acknowledge that it is almost impossible to deal with the needs of the estimated 10,000 to 20,000 people living on the streets. The city has barely 1,000 shelter beds, and hundreds of them are available only in the winter.The lack of preparation for the homeless here is obvious to those sweltering on the sidewalk outside the Society of St. Vincent de Paulrelief center in a zone of desolation between the office towers of downtownPhoenix and the State Capitol."I'm dying out here," said a homeless man in his 40's who goes by the name of Romeo, crouched in a sliver of shade on a littered sidewalk while waiting for a handout meal and a bottle of water. "The police are making us move all over the place. Where do they expect us to go? They need some more shelters."The Phoenix police and private social service agencies have been passing out thousands of bottles of water donated by grocery chains and individuals. But the fierce heat continues to take a toll."We've not seen anything like this before," said Tony Morales, a Phoenix police detective. "We get heat-related deaths every summer, usually 5 to 10 deaths through the whole summer, but nothing like this."In Maricopa County as a whole, which includes Phoenix and its suburbs, 21 people died of heat exposure all of last year, just one more than the city's toll in the last several days.Officials of the National Weather Service estimate that more than 200 heat records have been broken in the West during the last two weeks. On Tuesday,Las Vegas tied its record for any date, 117 degrees. Reno and other locations in Nevada have set records with nine consecutive days of temperatures at 100 or higher. The temperature in Denver on Wednesday reached 105 degrees, making it the hottest day there since 1878. The highest temperature for the entire region during the heat wave has been129, recorded at Death Valley, Calif.The weather forced airlines to cancel more than two dozen flights thisweek, remove passengers from fully loaded planes, limit the number of tickets sold on some flights and take other measures to withstand the heat.The reasons for that are related to engineering. Aircraft manufacturers have customarily set temperature limits at which their planes can be safely operated. (The limits are lower at higher altitudes, as in the RockyMountains, and higher at lower altitudes, as in the desert that surroundsLas Vegas.) High temperatures mean aircraft engines must take in more air in order to create the greater thrust the planes need to leave the ground.But airplane makers also have limits on the amount of thrust that an engine can produce. If the engines exceed those limits, they may not perform properly. At that point, aircraft manufacturers advise, the airlines should remove weight from planes - either passengers or cargo - or, in the worst cases, not fly at all.United Airlines canceled seven United Express flights out of Denver onWednesday, when the record-tying temperature there exceeded the operatinglimit for the carrier's propeller planes, said a spokesman, Jeff Green. "Itwas just so extreme, and stayed on so long, that we had to cancel flights,"Mr. Green said. America West canceled 22 flights out of its Las Vegas hub this week, 11 each on Monday and Tuesday. The temperature of 117 there was approachingthe limit for America West's regional jets: 117.26, above which they should not fly, said Linda Larsen, a spokeswoman for Mesa Airlines, which operates the flights for America West.On the other hand, Southwest Airlines, one of the biggest carriers operating in Las Vegas and Phoenix, has not canceled any flights because of the heat, a spokesman said. And Frontier Airlines merely refused to fly any pets.The extraordinary heat has lasted for many weeks in the Southwestern desert, where it has exacted a high price in lives along the Mexican border. Officials of the United States Bureau of Customs and BorderProtection say 101 illegal migrants have died of heat so far this fiscal year, which runs from October through September. That compares with 95 heat-related deaths in all of the previous 12 months.Twenty-one border crossers have died in Arizona just since July 1, saidSalvador Zamora, a spokesman for the border agency. The agency has stepped up its efforts to rescue migrants from the heat, using trucks and helicopters to aid people in distress in the brutal sun.Here in Phoenix, where the issue of rescue involves the homeless, Moises Gallegos, the city's deputy director of community services, said that space was available in downtown shelters but that some of the homeless refused to use it. Some are drug or alcohol abusers who do not want to be tested and treated, a condition for entry, and others are mentally ill and refuse all offers of help, Mr. Gallegos said.But some private social service agencies contend that there is a critical lack of shelter space here, and criticize officials for not opening a 500-bed city-owned homeless shelter that is used only in the winter."We need a year-round overflow shelter," said Terry Bower, director of the Human Services Campus Day Resource Center. Elsewhere in Arizona, firefighters are struggling to contain a swarm of 20 wildfires around the state, most sparked by lightning, including a 60,000-acre blaze northeast of Phoenix that shut several major highways. Across the West as a whole, 32 large wildfires are burning, fueled by the heat, dry conditions and a profusion of brush created by the winter's heavy rains, according to the National Interagency Fire Center.And in California, the state's Independent System Operator, which handles the flow of power to three-quarters of California customers, declared a Stage 2 emergency on Thursday and Friday, the first in two years. Stage 2 means that utilities are within 5 percent of their maximum production ofelectricity and that interruption of power to some customers is possible.Stephanie McCorkle, a spokeswoman for the Independent System Operator, said the emergency was in effect for Southern California and asked residents to conserve electricity. Ms. McCorkle said the system had experienced 14 consecutive days in which demand in Southern California was near capacity."The Bay Area is not hot, and that has been our saving grace," she said."L.A. is sizzling."Craig Schmidt, a meteorologist with the National Weather Service's regional headquarters in Salt Lake City, said records had been falling across theWestern states since the heat wave started on July 12. In Phoenix, it was at least 110 every day from July 11 to 19; on Friday the temperature peaked at 108.There may be some relief in sight, though: monsoons are moving into the area. The rain and cloud cover will cool things down a bit, officials said, but humidity will rise, prolonging the misery."Throughout the Western states - you have to estimate, but more than 200 records have probably been broken, and that's just talking daily records,"Mr. Schmidt said. "These records are no fun to break." Among the most remarkable was the one in Las Vegas, where the 117-degree reading on Tuesday matched the record for any date, set in 1942. The 95-degree low on Tuesday was also a record for Las Vegas, as was the average temperature that day, 104 degrees.In Death Valley, meanwhile, the temperature never dropped below 100 degrees in two 24-hour periods. Mr. Schmidt attributes the heat to a high pressure system that refused to budge."This one went on for so long, because there's a very strong ridge of high pressure centered over Utah and Arizona," he said, "and it kept the monsoon moisture from working its way northward. That usually cools things off with thunderstorms and clouds."Andy Bailey, a National Weather Service meteorologist in Las Vegas, said:"It's probably fair to say what just wrapped up was probably the most intense heat wave the city's ever seen. We had a string of four days where it was 115 or above."Now, however, the region is facing a new threat from the expected summer monsoons and thunderstorms, Mr. Bailey said."We're concerned with flash flooding today and tomorrow," he said. Micheline Maynard contributed reporting from New York for this article,Katie Zezima from Boston and John Dougherty from Phoenix.

Duw, mae'n boeth!

2005-07-12T23:22:00.000+03:00

Oh man it's hot here in Athens! I am fantasising about a week on a beach in Iceland, sunning myself on a glacier somewhere. In a while I shall go to bed, sure that I will wake up in about four hours with an unquenchable desire for cold orange juice. I have orange juice, but never enough for this heat.
Waiting for the bus in Chremonidou St in the morning turns into a frenzied battle with a dozen other commuters to occupy the one spot on the pavement which is shaded by an overhead balcony. This is followed by an undignified brawl on the bus to secure a position near the air conditioning unit. Walking from the bus stop in the centre of the city to my office now requires advance planning to chart out a route which offers maximum shade potential. Work, incidentally, is almost pleasant now, thanks to the air conditioning, though in an act of unparalleled malice my company has just deleted all the games from the server in order to encourage us to work just that little bit harder despite the heat. No chance!
I remember, when I was a kid, a well-known trash newspaper called the Sun, famous for its recent "scoop" which consisted of photos of Saddam Hussein in his boxer shorts, reported on a British "heatwave" with the memorable headline "Britain sizzles in the seventies" For those unfamiliar with trusty old Fahrenheit, 70 degrees F. is about 21 degrees centigrade, positively arctic compared with now.
Unable to sway the world's great leaders, I shall instead take full advantage of the global warming George Bush has decided to embrace rather than threaten the American economy and head off in a few days to the island of Serifos. I shall expose my genetically unprotected British skin to unwisely long periods of UV radiation and use foolishly low SPF sun cream. I hope many bloggers will be able to do the same or something similar.
Have a great summer, bloggers, or a great winter for those south of the equator.

Enjoy the summer, kalo kalokairi a mwynheuwch yr haf

Jamie

Gone, but not forgotten

2005-06-25T22:16:00.000+03:00

It's called Faslane. A highly lethal, environmentally unfriendly (it says so with admirable honesty on the packet) insecticide, probably banned in most of Europe. Greece, bless it, allows pharmacists to sell it with impunity. The chemist warned me that it was expensive, and at twenty euros it was. I went home and read the enclosed instruction leaflet, which informed me that the contents of one tube were enough to decockroach nine average flats. I used half the tube in my one underaverage-sized flat in the next twenty minutes.

Later I began to feel queasy. My stomach was churning. I have a phobia of toxic chemicals. I convinced myself I had somehow accidentally ingested some of the Faslane. The information leaflet informed me, encouragingly, that in cases of accidental ingestion, there is no antidote. All medical science can do is treat the symptoms and then leave you to hope for the best. Eventually I managed to reason with myself. The only way I could have ingested any of the poison would be to have accidentally licked behind the radiator or got my tongue stuck in the crack between the door frame and the wall. I knew both of these events were unlikely to have happened, at least without my remembering them, and calmed down.

I awoke the next morning and staggered into the kitchen, desperate for the swig of orange juice that kickstarts my system just after I wake up. As I entered the kitchen, a cockroach fell from the ceiling to the floor with an audible thud . The fall stunned it. It never awoke. Over the next few days the carnage continued apace. I found them everywhere. In my cutlery drawer, under my fridge, behind the washing machine. Faslane sends cockroaches into a state of lethargy. Then their vital signs begin to weaken. Ouzo does the same, and far more cheaply, but Faslane adds death to its list of side effects. My kitchen was awash with lethargic cockroaches for days afterwards. Then it was full of dead ones, each day requiring several gruesome sessions with the broom lest I tread on one, barefoot, as I always am at home. Next there was a brief period when only immature cockroaches were still evident, presumably hatched after the parents had expired and making a defiant last stand from their final enclave under my kettle. Then there were none. For two days now I have not seen a single one. Is this the end? Or are they merely taunting me? I shall let you know.

Good night, each. Kalhnyxta se olous sas. Nos da i chi gyd.

it was worth a try

2005-05-29T00:04:00.000+03:00

The exterminator came. I opened the door to him, expecting a short bald man with round rimless spectacles and an unhealthily expansive knowledge of endomological breeding habits. Instead in walked a handsome yet silent young man with enough toxins in a tank on his back to eliminate Birmingham. He was here for just five minutes, dealing death with every squirt.

He left.

The cockroaches pissed themselves laughing and organised a family get-together in my sink. It was like Naked Lunch but I kept my clothes on. The roaches are still giggling as I type.

Somewhere, around some corner, I shall find THE poison.

Kalinyxta se olous sas, good night each a nos da i chi gyd.

Jamie

Ach fy mhen i

2005-05-23T23:16:00.000+03:00

Penblwydd arall ddoe.

Pen dost y bore 'ma ond pwy sy'n becso dam? Pedwar deg pedwar o flynyddoedd wedi dod a wedi mynd a phob un yn dda. Does gen i ddim hawl i ddathlu? Dim boyfriend, dim job (wel, dim job perffaith), dim problem. Dwi'n teimlo'n optimistig iawn heddiw. Will it last? Mi wela'i.

Kalhnyxta se olous, good night each, nos da i chi gyd a phenblwydd hapus iawn i chi gyd,

Jamie

2005-05-15T22:28:00.000+03:00

Apart from saving money on shampoo, one of the more satisfying aspects of getting older, or reverse youthing as I prefer to call it, is a heightened sense of pleasure at being in your own house. I recall, when younger, a sense of panic if Saturday evening was approaching and a night out somewhere had not been planned. Now the idea of a cup of tea and a DVD to take me into Sunday sounds utterly acceptable. Whereas I was once incapable of remaining in the house all Sunday, the thought of having my backside firmly ensconced all afternoon on Dolores (this is not a sexist comment - Dolores is simply my pet name for my trusty deck chair, a snip at twenty-five euros from the ever blessed local LIDL supermarket) now sends a cosy frisson of pleasure down my spinal cord. Today's list of dizzy thrills included repotting a shrub and dead-heading the geraniums, interspersed with a dozen cups of Tetley's tea and frequent bouts of bum on said deck chair.
Sadly, tomorrow is Monday, and my pampered backside will be in intimate contact for far too many hours with the chair in my office. But Friday is just few short days away and much of the the intervening eveningtime will be spent with Dolores anyway.

Have a good week, bloggers, young and reverse youthed alike.

Kalhnyxta se olous, good night each, a nos da iawn i bob un ohonoch chi,

Jamie

Xronia polla

2005-05-03T22:44:00.000+03:00

Ach, I am back. Xronia polla blogosphere and thank you Helion for your kind comments. England was fine this time.The colours in England in spring are amazing. I know that's nostalgic trash 'cos the colours in every country are amazing in spring, but ex-pats are allowed a little extra nostalgia.
I am now back in front of the computer, somewhat the worse for wear after a fine evening last night with anatomy of melancholy. Sorry we never actually got round to watching the DVD, anatomy, but I've made a copy so we can do it some other night. I thought our rendition of Theos An Einai was exquisite by the way, though I suspect the neighbours were less enamoured of it. Never mind. I am usually a nice quiet neighbour, so I'm sure they will indulge me this once.

Have fun.

Kalhnyxta se olous sas, nos da i chi gyd and good night, each.

tempus fugit

2005-04-20T22:28:00.000+03:00

Giati o xronos pernaei toso grigora; Xthes htan Xristougenna. Shmera einai Pasxa. Avrio tha einai kalokairi kai methavrio tha eimai pali sto grafeio gia allo ena xrono. Hrtha sthn Ellada prin apo dwdeka xronia gia na meinw "enan xrono". Duo sxeseis meta kai eimai akoma edw. Mou leipei h Anglia apistevta synexeia kai molis ftanw sthn Anglia bariemai aforita kai metraw tis hmeres mexri na gyrisw. The grass is always greener, etc. Se liges hmeres tha eimai pali ekei. Tha perasw kalytera aythn th fora; Tha doume.
Kalo Pasxa, Happy Easter a Phasg Da se olous sas sth Blogosfaira,

Jamie

Theatre on the Roof.

2005-03-31T22:35:00.000+03:00

I was persuaded to attend the theatre last night, a rare change of Wednesday-night routine for a home-loving lad such as myself. Going turned out to be the right decision. I went to a place called the Train on the Roof, in Konstandinopoleos St, close to the big Praktiker in Pireos St. The theatre is housed in one of three old wooden railway carriages. The other two carriages are used for a restaurant and a bar. The evening was superb.

The theatre itself is excellent. The middle seats have been removed from the carriage to make way for the "stage", and if you're lucky enough to get the seats at the front, you have to keep moving your feet to make sure you don't trip the actors over - the place is tiny. The performance was memorable and superbly acted by the cast of seven. If you get the chance, check it out.

Excellent evening, or, as we say in Orc language, ardderchog!!

Kalhnyxta se olous, good night each, a nos da i chi gyd

nos sadwrn yn ein pentre bach ni

2005-03-19T22:55:00.000+02:00

Nos Sadwrn eto. Rydw i gartre yn gwrando ar miwsig i. Dwi ddim yn gwbod pam, ond yn y dyddiau hyn dwi ddim eisiau mynd allan o gwbl nos Sadwrn. Mae ffrindiau'n ffonio ac yn gofyn i mi am fynd allan rhywle, ond pob tro dwi'n ffeindio esgus i aros fan'ma. Nos Wener, nos Sul, does gen i ddim problem, ond nos Sadwrn mae'n well gen i aros yn y ty. Yn fuan mi fydd yr haf yn dod. Gobeithio bydd y pethau'n newid. Mi wela'i.

Nos da, bawb. Ewch allan! Nos Sadwrn yw e.

la cucuracha hic

2005-03-18T22:06:00.000+02:00

The alcohol has become less effective. Not for me, I hasten to add. For me it still manages to wrap me in a warm shroud of relaxation and help me ignore whatever has annoyed me during the day. I mean effective against my cockroaches. It used to dispatch them quickly and evoke terror. Now their whole attitude to ethanol has changed.

I decided to embark on another Buffy-type killing session today in my kitchen. I entered, spray in hand, and soon located a large cockroach taunting me from its vantage point on the tap. I approached. It stood its ground. Usually they squitter when they hear me, apart from Eric the Red, King of the Cockroaches, with whom I have reached an agreement. I will not kill him. He will remain at a distance from my toothbrush. The tap cockroach simply waited for me to zap it with 100% pure alcohol. As I did so, I noticed that suddenly, from nowhere, another dozen cockroaches of all ages were approaching me, each one tempting me to send them to cockroach Tir na Nog with a quick spurt of alcohol. I did so, and more came. I suddenly realised. I have created a whole generation of alcoholic cockroaches which relishes the thought of passing on inebriated into the next world.
The exterminator will be here soon. He will eliminate my cockroaches with obnoxious chemicals and remove them from my life permanently. In a perverse way, I shall miss them. They have been part of my life for some time now. I will try to trap Eric before the exterminator comes. I will release him in a local park. He can take my toothbrush with him.

Gerry Adams

2005-03-14T22:15:00.000+02:00

I noticed today several reports concerning snubs in Washington for Gerry Adams. The Independent reported that:

Alleged IRA links to the murder of Robert McCartney in Belfast and the £26m Northern Bank raid have displeased the American Republican party and Mr Adams is expected to face a barrage of tough questions in the US.

I always thought that the American regime believed that Sinn Fein and the IRA were two separate things. That while America was one of Britain's greatest allies, it respected (as do I, incidentally) the Irish people's right to vote for a radical republican party divorced from violence that sought a united, independent Ireland.

If they genuinely believe that Sinn Fein is not associated with the IRA, while should they now start to snub Mr. Adams because of the IRA-linked murder of Mr McCartney? What does Mr Adams have to do with it with the murder, given that Sinn Fein is not linked with the IRA? Have they suddenly recognised an IRA/Sinn Fein link? Or are they indirectly now admitting that they knew there was a link? I don't know if Sinn Fein are connected with the IRA, but the Americans' snubs now seem to suggest that they think they are. This means our greatest ally has, every year, welcomed a man they believed to be associated with bomb attacks and assassinations against British citizens. Had the British welcomed Colonel Qaddafi, who also claims to have nothing to do with terrorism, every year, would we now have the "special relationship" that Britain and America have "enjoyed" for so long?

Kalhnyxta se olous, nos da i chi gyd and goodnight each.

oh God

2005-03-10T22:31:00.000+02:00

I received this text today in an email from a friend. It worried me somewhat.

From Bill Moyers: There is no tomorrow

Published January 30, 2005

One of the biggest changes in politics in my lifetime is that the
delusional is no longer marginal. It has come in from the fringe, to
sit in the seat of power in the Oval Office and in Congress. For the
first time in our history, ideology and theology hold a monopoly of
power in Washington.

Theology asserts propositions that cannot be proven true; ideologues
hold stoutly to a worldview despite being contradicted by what is
generally accepted as reality. When ideology and theology couple, their
offspring are not always bad but they are always blind. And there is
the danger: voters and politicians alike, oblivious to the facts.

Remember James Watt, President Ronald Reagan's first secretary of the
interior? My favorite online environmental journal, the ever-engaging
Grist, reminded us recently of how James Watt told the U.S. Congress
that protecting natural resources was unimportant in light of the
imminent return of Jesus Christ. In public testimony he said, "after
the last tree is felled, Christ will come back."

Beltway elites snickered. The press corps didn't know what he was
talking about. But James Watt was serious. So were his compatriots out
across the country. They are the people who believe the Bible is
literally true -- one-third of the American electorate, if a recent
Gallup poll is accurate. In this past election several million good and
decent citizens went to the polls believing in the rapture index.

That's right -- the rapture index. Google it and you will find that the
best-selling books in America today are the 12 volumes of the "Left
Behind" series written by the Christian fundamentalist and
religious-right warrior Timothy LaHaye. These true believers subscribe
to a fantastical theology concocted in the 19th century by a couple of
immigrant preachers who took disparate passages from the Bible and wove
them into a narrative that has captivated the imagination of millions
of Americans.

Its outline is rather simple, if bizarre (the British writer George
Monbiot recently did a brilliant dissection of it and I am indebted to
him for adding to my own understanding): Once Israel has occupied the
rest of its "biblical lands," legions of the antichrist will attack it,
triggering a final showdown in the valley of Armageddon.

As the Jews who have not been converted are burned, the messiah will
return for the rapture. True believers will be lifted out of their
clothes and transported to Heaven, where, seated next to the right hand
of God, they will watch their political and religious opponents suffer
plagues of boils, sores, locusts and frogs during the several years of
tribulation that follow.

I'm not making this up. Like Monbiot, I've read the literature. I've
reported on these people, following some of them from Texas to the
West Bank. They are sincere, serious and polite as they tell you they
feel called to help bring the rapture on as fulfillment of biblical
prophecy. That's why they have declared solidarity with Israel and the
Jewish settlements and backed up their support with money and
volunteers. It's why the invasion of Iraq for them was a warm-up act,
predicted in the Book of Revelations where four angels "which are bound
in the great river Euphrates will be released to slay the third part of
man." A war with Islam in the Middle East is not something to be feared
but welcomed -- an essential conflagration on the road to redemption.
The last time I Googled it, the rapture index stood at 144 -- just one
point below the critical threshold when the whole thing will blow, the
son of God will return, the righteous will enter Heaven and sinners
will be condemned to eternal hellfire.

So what does this mean for public policy and the environment? Go to
Grist to read a remarkable work of reporting by the journalist Glenn
Scherer -- "The Road to Environmental Apocalypse." Read it and you will
see how millions of Christian fundamentalists may believe that
environmental destruction is not only to be disregarded but actually
welcomed -- even hastened -- as a sign of the coming apocalypse.

As Grist makes clear, we're not talking about a handful of fringe
lawmakers who hold or are beholden to these beliefs. Nearly half the
U.S. Congress before the recent election -- 231 legislators in total
and more since the election -- are backed by the religious right.

Forty-five senators and 186 members of the 108th Congress earned 80 to
100 percent approval ratings from the three most influential Christian
right advocacy groups. They include Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist,
Assistant Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, Conference Chair Rick
Santorum of Pennsylvania, Policy Chair Jon Kyl of Arizona, House
Speaker Dennis Hastert and Majority Whip Roy Blunt. The only Democrat
to score 100 percent with the Christian coalition was Sen. Zell Miller
of Georgia, who recently quoted from the biblical book of Amos on the
Senate floor: "The days will come, sayeth the Lord God, that I will
send a famine in the land." He seemed to be relishing the thought.

And why not? There's a constituency for it. A 2002 Time-CNN poll found
that 59 percent of Americans believe that the prophecies found in the
book of Revelations are going to come true. Nearly one-quarter think
the Bible predicted the 9/11 attacks. Drive across the country with
your radio tuned to the more than 1,600 Christian radio stations, or in
the motel turn on some of the 250 Christian TV stations, and you can
hear some of this end-time gospel. And you will come to understand why
people under the spell of such potent prophecies cannot be expected, as
Grist puts it, "to worry about the environment. Why care about the
earth, when the droughts, floods, famine and pestilence brought by
ecological collapse are signs of the apocalypse foretold in the Bible?
Why care about global climate change when you and yours will be rescued
in the rapture? And why care about converting from oil to solar when
the same God who performed the miracle of the loaves and fishes can
whip up a few billion barrels of light crude with a word?"

Because these people believe that until Christ does return, the Lord
will provide. One of their texts is a high school history book,
"America's Providential History." You'll find there these words: "The
secular or socialist has a limited-resource mentality and views the
world as a pie ... that needs to be cut up so everyone can get a
piece." However, "[t]he Christian knows that the potential in God is
unlimited and that there is no shortage of resources in God's earth ...
while many secularists view the world as overpopulated, Christians know
that God has made the earth sufficiently large with plenty of resources
to accommodate all of the people."

No wonder Karl Rove goes around the White House whistling that militant
hymn, "Onward Christian Soldiers." He turned out millions of the foot
soldiers on Nov. 2, including many who have made the apocalypse a
powerful driving force in modern American politics.

It is hard for the journalist to report a story like this with any
credibility. So let me put it on a personal level. I myself don't know
how to be in this world without expecting a confident future and
getting up every morning to do what I can to bring it about. So I have
always been an optimist. Now, however, I think of my friend on Wall
Street whom I once asked: "What do you think of the market?"I'm
optimistic," he answered. "Then why do you look so worried?" And he
answered: "Because I am not sure my optimism is justified."

I'm not, either. Once upon a time I agreed with Eric Chivian and the
Center for Health and the Global Environment that people will protect
the natural environment when they realize its importance to their
health and to the health and lives of their children. Now I am not so
sure. It's not that I don't want to believe that -- it's just that I
read the news and connect the dots.

I read that the administrator of the U.S. Environmental Protection
Agency has declared the election a mandate for President Bush on the
environment. This for an administration:

* That wants to rewrite the Clean Air Act, the Clean Water Act and the
Endangered Species Act protecting rare plant and animal species and
their habitats, as well as the National Environmental Policy Act, which
requires the government to judge beforehand whether actions might
damage natural resources.

* That wants to relax pollution limits for ozone; eliminate vehicle
tailpipe inspections, and ease pollution standards for cars,
sport-utility vehicles and diesel-powered big trucks and heavy
equipment.

* That wants a new international audit law to allow corporations to
keep certain information about environmental problems secret from the
public.

* That wants to drop all its new-source review suits against polluting,
coal-fired power plants and weaken consent decrees reached earlier with
coal companies.

* That wants to open the Arctic [National] Wildlife Refuge to drilling
and increase drilling in Padre Island National Seashore, the longest
stretch of undeveloped barrier island in the world and the last great
coastal wild land in America.

I read the news just this week and learned how the Environmental
Protection Agency had planned to spend $9 million -- $2 million of it
from the administration's friends at the American Chemistry Council --
to pay poor families to continue to use pesticides in their homes.
These pesticides have been linked to neurological damage in children,
but instead of ordering an end to their use, the government and the
industry were going to offer the families $970 each, as well as a
camcorder and children's clothing, to serve as guinea pigs for the
study.

I read all this in the news.

I read the news just last night and learned that the administration's
friends at the International Policy Network, which is supported by
Exxon Mobil and others of like mind, have issued a new report that
climate change is "a myth, sea levels are not rising" [and] scientists
who believe catastrophe is possible are "an embarrassment."

I not only read the news but the fine print of the recent
appropriations bill passed by Congress, with the obscure (and obscene)
riders attached to it: a clause removing all endangered species
protections from pesticides; language prohibiting judicial review for a
forest in Oregon; a waiver of environmental review for grazing permits
on public lands; a rider pressed by developers to weaken protection for
crucial habitats in California.

I read all this and look up at the pictures on my desk, next to the
computer -- pictures of my grandchildren. I see the future looking back
at me from those photographs and I say, "Father, forgive us, for we
know not what we do." And then I am stopped short by the thought:
"That's not right. We do know what we are doing. We are stealing their
future. Betraying their trust. Despoiling their world."

And I ask myself: Why? Is it because we don't care? Because we are
greedy? Because we have lost our capacity for outrage, our ability to
sustain indignation at injustice?

What has happened to our moral imagination?

On the heath Lear asks Gloucester: "How do you see the world?" And
Gloucester, who is blind, answers: "I see it feelingly.'"

I see it feelingly.

The news is not good these days. I can tell you, though, that as a
journalist I know the news is never the end of the story. The news can
be the truth that sets us free -- not only to feel but to fight for the
future we want. And the will to fight is the antidote to despair, the
cure for cynicism, and the answer to those faces looking back at me
from those photographs on my desk. What we need is what the ancient
Israelites called hochma -- the science of the heart ... the capacity
to see, to feel and then to act as if the future depended on you.

Believe me, it does.

Bill Moyers was host until recently of the weekly public affairs series
"NOW with Bill Moyers" on PBS. This article is adapted from AlterNet,
where it first appeared. The text is taken from Moyers' remarks upon
receiving the Global Environmental Citizen Award from the Center for
Health and the Global Environment at Harvard Medical School.

© Copyright 2005 Star Tribune.
All rights reserved.

bravo, re George

2005-03-07T23:21:00.000+02:00

I would like to congratulate George Bush on his sterling efforts to force Syria out of the Lebanon. The man is absolutely right. No nation has the right to invade another sovereign State to impose their own version of peace and justice, however lofty their ideals. I mean, could you imagine the Americans doing something like that?

Kalhnyxta se olous, good night each a nos da i chi gyd
Jamie

Red ken

2005-03-04T22:15:00.000+02:00

Another attempt to smear Ken Livingstone as a racist! The man does not, as was recently stated, have a racist bone in his body. To criticise the policies of Israel is not anti-Semitic. It is anti-Israeli policy. Criticising the actions of George Bush is not anti-American. It is anti-George Bush policy. To suggest that anyone who criticises the policy of Israel's regime is anti-Semitic is ludicrous. Millions of Jewish people are not Israeli and are horrified by the Israelis' action. Many many Israeli people are also opposed to Sharon's actions. To smear anyone who critices Sharon as an anti-Semite stifles debate and can only eventually play into the hands of that moronic group of sub-humans who cling to racist anti-Semitic stereotypes. I am thoroughly opposed to what happened in Germany when Hitler was in power. I would condemn Hitler and his nightmare cronies unequivocably. Does that make me anti-German? I have a degree in German, so probably not. Should I now apologise as an anti-German for criticising Hitler?

that or which

2005-02-23T22:33:00.000+02:00

One final language question before bed. I get cheesed off with my spell check because it queries my use of the word "which" all the time. If I write "The events which were about to take place were to have a major impact", the spell check rejects it, claiming that in defining relative cluses only "that" is acceptable. "Which" is strictly for non-defining clauses. Is this right? Is it a difference between British or American English? Or is Windows just inventing its own rules?
Nos da etc
Jamie

eats shoots and leaves

2005-02-18T19:10:00.000+02:00

I've got an apostrophe question. I had a translation today about cheese made from the milk of goats. Bloggers, do I need an apostrophe, and if so, where? I.e. is it:

goats' cheese (does the cheese belong to the goats?)

goat cheese (is the cheese made of goats?)

goats cheese (compound noun - first element usually singular)

goat's cheese (does the cheese belong to a specific goat?)

Google searches came up with hundreds of hits for all of them.

All help gratefully accepted.

Kalhnyxta se olous, good night each and nos da i chi gyd

Jamie

the world's cheesiest

2005-02-11T22:26:00.000+02:00

I have today received the world's cheesiest email. It is so bad, I have to share it with the world. Clench your buttocks firmly. Place a bucket near to your computer and read on.

Subject: FW: The BoxI received this from a friend who had a choice to make.It said that I had a choice to make too. I've chosen.Now it's your turn to choose.The story goes that some time ago a mother punishedher 5 year old daughter for wasting a roll ofexpensive gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and she became even more upset whenthe child used the gold paper to decorate a box to putunder the Christmas tree. Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift box toher mother the next morning and said, "This is foryou, Momma."The mother was embarrassed by her earlierover-reaction, but her anger flared again when sheopened the box and found it was empty. She spoke to her daughter in a harsh manner. "Don'tyou know, young lady, when you give someone a present there's supposed to be something inside the package?"The little girl had tears in her eyes and said, "Oh,Momma, it's not empty! I blew kisses into it until itwas full." The mother was crushed. She fell on herknees and put her arms around her little girl, and she begged her forgiveness for her thoughtless anger. An accident took the life of the child only a short time later, and it is told that the mother kept that gold box by her bed for all the years of her life.Whenever she was discouraged or faced difficult problems she would open the box and take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there. In a very real sense, each of us, as human beings,have been given a Golden box filled with unconditional love and kisses from our children, family and friends.There is no more precious possession anyone could hold. You now have two choices: 1. Pass this on to your friends, or 2. Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice No. 1. Friends are like angels who lift us to our feet, when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

On the subject of cheese, has anyone noticed that the sick bags on easyjet flights are sponsored by a film developing company? If you choose not to vomit in the bag, you can use it instead to send off your films to be developed. It bears the memorable marketing slogan "Don't be sick. Sind your film to quickpic". Marvellous.

Kalhnyxta se olous, nos da i chi gyd and good night to everyone,

Jamie

More help needed

2005-02-10T23:02:00.000+02:00

Hi. I am also looking to see if anyone has any info on something I read lately on the Net. The article I read claimed that there was a greater affinity between Germanic and Celtic civilisation than is sometimes assumed, and was largely based on the similarity of a Celtic form "tud", meaning something like "people" or "nation", and the word "teutonic". Basing any argument on one word is a bit tenuous, I know, but it sounded interesting, at least. Anyone know any useful links?
Ta, folks,
Jamie

Any info

2005-02-10T22:56:00.000+02:00

Hi. Am looking for any info on use of Welsh language in England, particularly in Herefordshire, Shropshire etc. I know the language was still used up until the 19th? century at least. Can't find anything on Net to help. Any info gratefully accepted. Ta a lot.
Night night,
Jamie

Here we go again?

2005-02-04T23:18:00.000+02:00

I noticed today that I seem to be reading the word "Iran" more and more often lately. On the Net. In the newspapers. Is it my imagination?
Good night each, kalh nyxta se olous a nos da i chi gyd

blwyddyn newydd dda

2005-01-12T22:33:00.000+02:00

Mi hoffwn i ddweud blwyddyn newydd dda i bob un ohonoch chi yn nhir y blog sy'n siarad Cymraeg. O'n i'n arfer siarad yn eitha dda, ond rwan, heb y cyfle i ymarfer yr iaith, yn anffodus rwy wedi angofio bron popeth. Mi fasai'n neis cael neges oddi wrth rywun yn y Gymraeg weithiau i roi tipyn bach o ysbrydoliaeth i mi i astudio ac i ail-ddysgu'r iaith.
Diolch yn fawr iawn a phob hwyl i chi gyd. Mae'n ddrwg iawn gen i am fy nghamgymeriadau!
Good night, kalyhyxta se olous a nos da i chi gyd.

Jamie

Help needed.

2005-01-10T22:27:00.000+02:00

Dear Bloggers,

Help! My house appears to have become an entomological nature reserve. After finding 25 cockroaches under a plastic shopping bag from Lidl on Saturday, I decided I really had to so something. The entire kitchen is now in a greater state of carbolicised sterility than the average operating theatre. Every nook and cranny has been filled with plaster to prevent access. The result? A team of ants moved in on Sunday to show solidarity with the oppressed cockroach community.
Having almost poisoned myself to death with spray, I began searching for a safer way to eliminate them. After a fortunate experiment, I discovered that pure alcohol kills cockroaches as well as any spray. I am a peaceful vegetarian and do not like killing things anyway, so I decided that, if you gotta go, what better way than to drown in a sea of pure alcohol? Imagine strolling around the Acropolis and suddenly seeing a giant hand appear from the sky. It dowses you in a vaste outpouring of ouzo. You descend into a sweet vortex of oblivion and next thing you know, you're wearing wings and playing a harp. So today, I send a few of the little buggers out of this world with a blast of booze. Unfortunately, a small accident with a lighted cigarette also saw me set fire to the coffee pot, my washing up liquid, the sink and the bottle of alcohol itself. I could give up smoking, I suppose, but let's not be unreasonable. Does anybody out there know how I could just reason with these visitors and get 'em to move out?

Many thanks, bloggers,

Kalhnyxta se olous, good night and nos da i chi gyd.

James

sea monkeys

2004-12-17T23:17:00.000+02:00

As the ouzo works its magic and I descend into the reverie that only Friday night and the realisation that i am freed of the shackles of gainful employment for the next two days can bring, my thoughts turn to sea monkeys, as they do. This is largely due to my good mate, Tom, who recently underwent a traumatic experience when his sea monkey eggs failed to hatch. When I was a child and utterly hooked on Superman comics, I remember reading advertisements for them in the comics each month. I dreamed of having my own nuclear family swimming around in my bedroom and cursed the backwardness of parochial England for not selling them in Woolworths Could anybody out there in cyberland tell me, what the hell are they? Are they baby shrimps, frogs, what? Enquiring minds need to know.

Thank you in advance.

As ever, kalhnyxta se olous, kala Xristougenna, Nadolig Llawen and have a great Christmas,

Jamie

Changing the name of Lesbos

2004-12-17T22:55:00.000+02:00

When I first came to Athens many years ago, I remember seeing an advertisement on a bus. It was, my limited knowledge of Greek told me, an advertisement for a performance of "The Lesbian Choir of Athens." I was well impressed, in what I had been told was a conservative country, to see advertisements for an all-woman, all-gay choir, proudly displayed on the number 11 trolley. I was so disappointed when I discovered the choir was made up of ex-Mytilinean ladies who'd moved to Athens. Never mind, I'm sure the performance was excellent.

Kalhnyxta kai kales giortes se olous
Good night and Merry Christmas, everyone

illegal immoral or fattening

2004-12-11T22:17:00.000+02:00

I am sitting here drinking an ouzo large enough to make the late great Oliver Reed tremble. At the same time, I am smoking a cigarette, which, according to the health warning, has enough toxins in it to wipe out a small army. I am enjoying both of them thoroughly. Why is is that human beings enjoy the things that are so bad for them? Why do I not want to eat twenty portions of fresh uncooked vegetables a day, whereas twenty cigarettes a day come so naturally? Why is it that two portions of fresh fruit a day are a drag, whereas two drinks a day are an utter pleasure? Why is it that I put off going for a healthy walk, yet when I wake up on Sunday morning, I have no desire at all to put off staying in bed?
Answers on the back of a cigarette packet please.
Kalh nyxta se olous

Jamie

Inspirational legal leadership, guys.

2004-12-06T23:32:00.000+02:00

Apparently, the lawyers trying to ban Alexander have abandoned their legal case. The reason behind this sudden change of heart? They SAW the film. Yup, they never actually mentioned that they hadn't actually seen the film they were trying to stop. Apparently they were invited to a private screening and suddenly decided "it wasn't that bad". " Innocent until proven guilty" has become "guilty until you actually watch it". I shall be conducting my own defence if I ever get arrested.

kalhnyxta

Jamie

Historical Truth Rools

2004-12-05T23:02:00.000+02:00

I was delighted to hear assurances from a group of lawyers attempting to sue the makers of the new film about Alexander the Great that they are motivated solely by a desire to see films portray historical truth and that anti-gay prejudice has nothing to do with their legal action.

One wonders where they were when Dreamworks portrayed Professor John Nash as a heterosexual in A Beautiful Mind. Why did they not pressure Warner Brothers into going into somewhat more detail about what precisely Achilles was doing in his tent for four days with his close friend until he finally agreed to come out and fight? And why did the death of his aforementioned close friend leave him quite so cheesed off with the Trojans?

Indeed, this intrepid group of history-loving but not at all prejudiced lawyers have so much work to do in their quest for historical truth. They could harangue Mel Gibson for his hugely entertaining and historically almost entirely fictitious version of the life of William Wallace in Braveheart. They could have a go at the jokers who informed us that their film was the historical truth a few months ago in the unentertaining story of King Arthur (whoever heard of a Celtic tribe called the Woads - woads was a type of body paint).

Returning to the not prejudiced history-loving lawyers, one of the reasons they objected to the film is that there is, in their opinion, no documented evidence that Alexander in any way enjoyed the intimate company of men and therefore it is historically inaccurate to suggest that this was the case. Well, first of all, many historians would beg to differ. Indeed, one respected historian recently had to be escorted away by the police after attempting to claim such evidence did exist. A large group of unprejudiced truth seekers tried to stone him in the name of historical accuracy. Secondly, does the absence of evidence mean he must be straight? There's absolutely no documentary evidence that I like men so, in the unlikely event of future film makers wanting to make a film about a sad old ex-pat like me, should they automatically portray me as straight? Is straight the default option? Of course not. Especially if all you are interested in is historical accuracy.

Kαληνύχτα σε όλους and good night to all.
Jamie